The other night I dreamed

that my friend D and I and some other folks were on a road trip somewhere, and I had been in charge of making travel plans, but apparently I wasn't very good at it. We were starving, without lodging, in a busted-up car; I think we were trying to get to Vegas but there was no way the car was going to make it.

I found Satan in an old motel room somewhere. He was trying to make a living as a travel agent. He really looked scary--like eight feet tall, with these bat-ear horns, all in black--even his face covered in black--very broad, maybe a little pudgy. I think because of the pudge--and the fact that he was scratching himself while slumming in this dingy motel, with some clearly strung-out women laying around and wandering in and out--I wasn't scared of him and got down to the business of negotiating our travel plans.

He offered to take us to Vegas himself by absorbing us into his body, magically transporting himself to Vegas in a flash, and then un-absorbing us. He said it would feel weird and we would lose our physical forms while we were absorbed. I thought that the speedy travel sounded appealing, but then again, this was Satan we were talking about. He offered to do it for no cost, except for our souls.

I was like, "Dude. Come on. Fifty bucks, no souls, and none of the shape-shifting stuff."